solstice

Jun. 21st, 2006 11:22 pm
jainajade: female vampire hunter posing by stained glass window (JJ window)
[personal profile] jainajade
Longest day of the year, apparently. It snuck up on me, what with the time differential between -- well. What with quirks of portals and all.

I'm trying not to feel sorry for myself. I've done that already, many times. I should be happy with what I have: the eye of a charming chap, the ability to weasel free caffeine out of him...

...wreckage to live in and to feel sorry for myself in...

Shit.

I've already sung this song, I know. Poor JJ. She broke the rules and cried about it. Pity! Pity for the freaky-haired, freaky-headed idiot!

I'm not sorry to have lived my life. I like my adopted family members and assorted friends. I'm glad I met someone as interested in me as I am in him. He's a mage too; Kara would approve.

And there's the problem. I don't have Kara anymore. I like my new life, but I liked my old one too, and I have never understood why the old had to die away.

Oh geez, explanations. Um. When I was a kid, my family decided I would take up the family business. That happened to be smiting the undead, which sounds exciting but is actually a bitch. I was trained by a wonderful woman named Kara, whose approval meant everything to me -- so of course I was nothing like her. She was clever and quite talented; I was clumsy, slow, and a test of her limited patience.

She died. I was supposed to be proving how well she'd trained me, and I totally choked, and it was all my fault.

Family was not at all happy about losing a good worker and being stuck with me instead. They kicked me out and cut all ties. Screw them anyway, I figured, and walked away.

Except that in my head, I still belong there.

It's getting dark -- not safe to be writing. Tonight will be short work, and then I can sleep. If I'm lucky I won't even dream about waking up back home. Those are nightmares in reverse. They're lovely. And then you wake up, and they're not anymore.

Date: 2006-06-22 09:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] weft.livejournal.com
He is NOT as interested in you as you are in him. I don't know how to say this kindly. Your 'mage' is bad news.

Date: 2006-06-22 11:09 pm (UTC)
ext_409850: female vampire hunter wielding a wooden cross  (Default)
From: [identity profile] jainajade.livejournal.com
So you're psychic! You know exactly how interested he is in me and I in him, do you? And you expect me to believe your little theory of negativity? Sorry, pet, I don't think so.

I don't know why you're so obsessed with Suitov, but it's getting old. Drop it already.

Date: 2006-06-25 07:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] weft.livejournal.com
Do you know what? I just remembered, I don't care if he sacrifices you to some machination at the first timely opportunity. So, please, accept my apology for letting sympathy get the better of me, forget my last message and let me rephrase--

Squee! OMG! U guysr so KAYOOT 2getha! I think u shld get like so attached and make wedding plans n all!

P.S. Consider me also flailing around like an overjoyed anime character.

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Jaina Jade

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